She slept with someone else while we were dating

She said she had sex with a friend of her while we where dating . Because you' re OVER someone, doesn't mean your INTO someone else.
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If you want to vomit at the thought of her riding another guys member and loving it while she was seeing you, get rid of her. Otherwise, well, nah, no otherwise She had a BF when you two first slept together? Classic case of those who lie with you will lie against you. I thought she really liked you? I guess not so much. I think you know what you need to do. Haha so she cheated on her boyfriend with you? Then she cheated on you? What don't you get about this situation? Dog bites previous owner, then bites you. What makes you think you can trust this girl considering how you got together in the first place?

Why are you surprised? Just remember, you knowingly pursued a girl who cheated on her boyfriend with you. That speaks volumes on how much trust she deserves. Originally Posted by googleccd. Hard to say if she was cheating or just casually dating and unsure about you then realized what she wanted. Sounds like it warrants a discussion Sounds an unpleasant and similar situation to what I've been in, whether you were casually dating or not. Originally Posted by Talak7. Originally Posted by road. So you call moving in with a guy and sleeping with that guy and dating others as a casual relationship?

Well there you have it I think you get the message, OP You just proved the old mantra is true: If they cheat with you, they'll cheat on you.


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She needs to go by by. Disregard Females, Aquire Currency. All times are GMT The time now is 9: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number. Contact Us - LoveShack. Add Thread to del. Cheating, Flirting, and Jealousy Being unfaithful to your significant other or suspect them of the same?

Can't stand the way they flirt? Discuss your experiences here. Just found out my girl had sex with a friend while we were seeing each other First, a bit of back story.

She had sex with him while we were dating. Should I take her back?

Originally Posted by googleccd You deserve it, now you know how her ex feels. Originally Posted by Talak7 Hard to say if she was cheating or just casually dating and unsure about you then realized what she wanted. Originally Posted by road Alright discuss this: Working on a clear blue summer sky, at BuddhaDhammaSangha Posts: Eastern Shore of Maryland Posts: She found out about the new girl and She has since then grown to love you and built a relationship with you and wants to be with you.

Those are all good things. Even if she was seeing other people when you first started going out, she chose you over those other people. Don't make her regret that choice by treating her like a cheater when she isn't. If you sincerely can't get over this, though, breaking up with her is the right thing to do. Not because she wronged you, but because you need to work through this and not take it out on her while you do it. You're not wrong for feeling how you feel. She's not wrong for doing what she did. As a data point, the norm among my friends is to continue multiple sexual relationships, or at least openness to them, until there has been an explicit conversation about sexual monogamy with a given partner.

Even if someone was "instantly smitten" or in love at first sight, it wouldn't be out of the ordinary to be having sex with other people too.

She had sex with him while we were dating. Should I take her back? - guyQ by AskMen

And I just skimmed your posting history and I dunno. I'm not gonna say DTMF but at this stage things should really still be unicorns shitting rainbows, and it doesn't seem like it is for you. There's some combination of her not being the girl for you and you not being the boy and since you can't actually make her be different from how she is, or has been, you might want to think about what you're bringing that needs to change in a relationship with her , or doesn't need to change, and work on that.

For me, the beginning of a relationship is a very delicate time because I'm the type who focuses on one person at a time, and if I find out that the person I'm seeing has seen someone else, after having met and dated me but before any discussions of exclusivity have taken place, it ruins it entirely for me. I'm like an animal. If a guy has another woman's scent on him I lose interest entirely. Since you weren't exclusive, and she was obviously in a different headspace and enjoying a bachelorette's lifestyle instead of zeroing in on you at the time, she didn't do anything immoral.

That being said, I wouldn't be able to continue my relationship if I found this out. Gross posted by Avosunspin at Especially with online dating, I think this kind of thing is normal because it's a defense against getting hurt. Even if she really seriously liked you, she had no way of knowing that early if you genuinely felt the same. Love at first sight is a romantic notion, but letting yourself indulge that impulse is more likely to lead to you crying your eyes out staring at a last text from someone who ghosted weeks ago than it is to a happily-ever-after.

It is normal and healthy to give it a bit longer before you take things really seriously. This doesn't always mean actively dating or sleeping with other people, but it can. Online dating is different than meeting through other means, when you have more reason to think that the other party is ready to take the relationship seriously from the beginning.

If you're going to be online dating in future, it's a good idea to either get used to that idea That doesn't mean it's bad that you feel hurt about this! It just puts it into the realm of "negative self-talk" if your brain isn't listening to reason, not necessarily "totally sensible thing to break up over". You might have other totally reasonable things to break up over, but it'd be better to deal with the negative thoughts first before trying to appraise that.

Strong vote to buck up and get over it. You liked her enough to be exclusive to her even before you met her , and you're now upset because you found out she didn't feel the same way about you at the very beginning.


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  • Topic: She slept with someone else while we were dating;

You obviously understand on a mental level that there was no agreement of exclusivity at the time. But it's bugging you because this is making you feel less valued in the relationship and that's pretty uncomfortable for you.

I Can't Believe My Ex-Girlfriend Slept With Him So Quickly @hodgetwins

This isn't about your value in the relationship. It's about her exercising her right and agency to explore relationships until the time you became exclusive. Until you agree on exclusivity, when and with who and how many times and whether she enjoyed it simply don't matter. There's nothing wrong with what she did. Having your feelings about the unwanted info is also OK.

But, don't start treating her differently and letting this become a toxic thought. That's absolutely not fair and it's much worse to be speculating about her trustworthiness based on this conversation because now you're 9 months down the road and are in a real relationship. She was honest with you, don't punish her for that. Also, if you know that this is a bad topic for you, stop having this conversation.

It's absolutely fine to say, "I prefer to not discuss this" and move on. Lots of couples take that road and avoid this snare. I too remember your username and your last question. It seems like at minimum, you and your girlfriend have different communication styles.

My girlfriend slept with someone else while we were dating and more!?

At medium, you have very different opinions about sex and sexual boundaries within relationships. At most you're generally incompatible. I'm leaning toward incompatible based off the questions and language in this ask. I think it's fine to be upset when you had this idea that she was everything to you and she didn't necessarily feel the same.

It's also quite normal to have multiple dates from online dating. You're trying to defend the ups and downs with love. When things move fast, sometimes those rushes of feelings can overwhelm red or yellow flags. EVERY relationship has ups and downs. It's the nature of relationships. It's how BIG those ups and downs are. So when you specifically mention "ups and downs" they're probably a bigger issue than you'd want them to be or that is good for a long term relationship.

Again, I don't know your relationships, but language like that and past asks FEEL like things I said or friends said while in bad relationships. If you have a pattern of not dealing with something "well" then it may be indicative of some other issue you have irrespective of the details of your current relationship. You don't have the right to make her feel bad about this. You two are close, and you could easily stab at her and hit home. You'd hurt yourself far, far worse by acting unprincipled and small-minded and foolish but you're welcome to do that, except for the part about it also hurting her, which you don't get to do.