Dating coworkers in retail

37% of workers have dated a coworker [of those relationships, 1 in 3 that what someone does for a living influences whether they would date.
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She might be willing to take a risk to date a coworker she has a huge crush on, but not to date someone she doesn't know well. Doing so will jeopardize not only your safety on the job but also your colleague's safety. I've seen this happen recently, at a nearby store that I go to often for food. At this store, everyone is on part-time shifts. But when one male part-time worker started to hit on a female colleague, the rumor spread like wildfire, and soon, every part-time female worker and the owner of the store became aware of the creepy, persistent male colleague.

The owner then reduced his shifts and work hours considerably - just short of firing him. As you can see from this example, it's very risky, and the damage could be irreversible - you might have to leave your job, at a minimum, if things don't work out and drama ensues. You're too young to be worried about corporate policy BS. Its a part time job. Unless you and your family desperately need the income from this part time job to survive, you have very little to lose.

And I'd think it extraordinarily unlikely you'd be fired for simply asking her out. Even if she says no, its unlikely she'd complain to a manager. Just respect her wishes if she declines. By clicking "Post Your Answer", you acknowledge that you have read our updated terms of service , privacy policy and cookie policy , and that your continued use of the website is subject to these policies.

relationships - Ask coworker out on casual retail job - Interpersonal Skills Stack Exchange

Home Questions Tags Users Unanswered. Ask coworker out on casual retail job Ask Question. I am a casual part time retail employee in Australia. I work there once or twice a week, more on holidays I am in high school. Crafter 5, 1 25 Joao Joao 26 1. Lug Gian Lug Gian 31 2.

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I'm glad you're asking this; it's an important question, and it seems that you have an open mind and are willing to listen and learn. Yes, it certainly can happen successfully, sometimes - I wrote my answer to you while prioritizing your need to protect your job safety and security, as well as the safety of your colleague. Hutchinson Apr 1 '18 at 6: Here's why it might be a problem for your boss: I don't know you very well yet, but I would like to go on a date with you.

No pressure to say yes -- I know it might be weird because we work together. I wasn't sure whether to ask in the first place because we work together, and I know that might feel weird, so no pressure.

It convinces her that you know you should not be "creepy" about this and that you will respect what she wants. It gives her a gentle way to decline if she's not interested. Don't ask her out. I'll expand on my answer in the context of a real-life example: I'm very close friends with the owner, who kept me updated on the situation. It's best to make romantic connections with people outside of your job.

The OP should be sure what he does is not misconstrued, and that he does not keep "flirting with" or "sounding out" his coworker if she's not enthusiastically encouraging him. Oleg If you rank a female which is asking her colleague if he joins her for burger lunch once under creepy and persistent, you will misjudge her almost always. Mind you, this answer does not make any attempt to discern different approaches, it's all bad.


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It's like saying "Never ever swim" because you are afraid of drowning. Mar 31 '18 at I think there are huge cultural differences around coworkers dating. I don't think I ever heard it in Europe, while in the US it's common practice. The most useful thing would be some insight from somebody from Australia. Workplace romance can and does happen successfully, sometimes - but it would be immoral to encourage the OP to pursue romance with a coworker, without making them aware of the potential consequences.

Try and establish some kind of contact before you ask, though, don't do it out of the blue before you've ever even chatted to her. Also, what kind of store is it? You could start some kind of conversation based on what you're looking for there and what you like, if it's a record or video store it could make things a lot easier. Sorry, but the card approach sucks. Passing notes to indicate you like somebody is generally frowned upon once you leave grade school. I flirt shamelessly with "retail workers" all the time and, really, it doesn't have to be a big deal.

You don't need a specific plan or several battle scenarios.

The process is generally very simple: Say it in a way that shows you mean it--smile and look her in the eye! In step 1, you can improve your chances greatly improve if you can make her laugh. One time I asked this quite pretty woman where the cough syrup was and she said 'Aisle X' or something. I paused, and told her she was undoubtedly the most helpful clerk I'd ever met in my entire life.

After a couple of minutes of me explaining how blown away I was by her deft handling of my situation she gave me her number. I didn't even have to ask. It's quite ok to make a fool of yourself, just don't be a prick. I second incessant's advice: I have had so many creepy experiences with dudes just hanging out, staring at you "meaningfully" it comes off menacing 9 times out of 10 and trying to start schmoozy conversations they think is flirting "Wow, have you ever modelled?

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Since it's our job to smiling and accomadating, many older, skeezy men see this as open invitation to comment on our loveliness, the great color of our sweater etc. It makes us a little jaded or at least it did me when it comes to strangers in the workplace, so the straight forward approach is always appreciated. Don't try to seduce, just be an interesting guy and ask us out. I thought he was the hottest thing going too, and I was just too shy in general.

I'd visit him secretly at work for 3 months before I finally asked him out We've been together 5 and half years ;- posted by ibeji at 6: Building up familiarity through regular patronage would be my suggestion. Once a person is familiar with you, you can begin to establish a relationship, however insignificant it may seem. Which can easily snowball into a more significant relationship should you -- or they -- pursue it. Of course the big action back in retail was with the retail workers at other stores and indeed how I met my wife , not that I suggest you bend your career that way.

I guess it depends if you get a vibe or not. If you get the vibe then its about someone you meet asking you out, not about customers. If you don't know if you feel the vibe, then I suspect it ain't there, as the retail worker knows they need to over do it to make it clear this is more than business. Apply for a job at the store. I once wrote a withdrawal slip for a pretty young woman who worked in a bank in a small, gossipy town.

As someone who has worked in retail for a long time leaving a note would probably get laughed off, and even if they were interested could be negative points. Don't chat them up on break initially. If others are anything like me, they don't want to talk to customers while on break at all.

Just ask them to a movie or something after a few conversations where they seem interested. If they turn you down, don't come back to the store for a while. I had this situation with a woman at a coffee place that I had a crush on. It was my regular place, she was one of three women who worked there and I sorta got obsessed with her, and asking here out. I went to Mexico, and came back with little gifts for each of the three I went to this coffee place every day so I was pretty familiar with them. Finally, while I was sitting at an outside table there, this women took a break and came and sat at my table to chat.

I said, "well, would you like to go to a show, or something, sometime," and she said yes. A week later, I had still not asked her out, but was planning on it, and she saw me with a female friend, and I think she assumed that I was in a couple at the time. I wasn't even dating anyone. My fantasy life around her, by this time, with all the hemming and hawing, had gotten sorta, um, detailed, so I was embarrassed to even see her. All this to say, don't be circumspect and waste a lot of time. What if there were checkboxes on the back?

I think incessant pretty much nailed it. Few years ago, I was supposed to meet a friend for coffee. Various things intervened, he didn't show up, so I spent a few hours reading a book, drinking coffee, and people-watching.

How To Ask A Co-Worker Out On A Date In 2018

One of the things we talked about was this question exactly. He was at the time a server at a high-traffic coffee shop in the gaybourhood, so you can imagine the ridiculous number of men who'd come in and hit on him. The only ones he ever gave the time of day to were people like me: Anyone who clearly tried to become a regular in order to flirt with him got the cold shoulder, anyone who hung out to nab him on his break got lthe same.

Don't try and become a regular. Ask them out, leave the ball in their court, and be prepared to make a charming and graceful exit. I must say, I don't get some of the responses here. Although I agree with some I think they are making it too complicated. If you like her, dress nicely, act nicely, and say that you do like her and would like to go out with her some day when she is free. If she says no, ok, that's it - if yes, then that's another thread. What can you lose? If it becomes so embarrassing for you, I'm sure there are either other stores or other cashiers for you.

Mate, take control of your life. You only have one.