Infidelity in college dating relationships

Abstract. The present author investigated several motivational factors for infidelity within college dating relationships. A sample of college students (86 male.
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The reasons for cheating can run the gamut. According to Tina B. People who feel entitled to sex any way they can get it, will always rationalize cheating, and just keep doing it. They don't want to work on marital issues, or learn to keep intimacy alive with the same person. They get their jollies from illicit sex.

If you've had a conversation about infidelity with any group of people, there's usually someone who throws out the idea that happy people don't cheat. Tessina says that there is some merit to that, albeit, not always the case. Relationships take work, and when one or both parties aren't willing to put the effort in, it can feel easier to find what's lacking elsewhere.

You may have heard the idea or even joked with your partner about the idea of a "pass" list — essentially, celebrity crushes you have that, if ever the opportunity presented itself, your significant other would be OK with you sleeping with as a one time thing. Granted, these types of conversations are all in fun — because there's no way you're likely ever going to have the chance to nail that supermodel. One day this person flirts or hits on them!

There's an opportunity to turn a fantasy into reality and be with this hot person. Maybe the married person's spouse is out of town or the would be cheater is away on business and the chance of getting caught is extremely remote. Essentially, this may be a once in a lifetime opportunity to be with him or her.

On occasion, this type of cheater may give into peer pressure. They may be hanging out with their friends in hotel lounge bar who are egging them on to go for it. Cheaters like this are guilty of caving in to temptation. Why Do Women Cheat? What Real Women Say: But I'm not sure if it means you shouldn't be together. I think that depends on the reason why you cheated. In my case, it was like therapy to get through what I was unhappy with in my life.

I think it is different for everyone, but I will say if you're only in a relationship a short time and you or your partner is cheating, then you probably shouldn't be together. If a couple that's facing infidelity so publicly can reconcile, we should be able to do it too, right?

Tinder Loving Cheaters: Dating App Facilitates Infidelity | Texas Tech Today | TTU

Megan Stubbs says that having your relationship make a full recovery can be a very long road — one that, if you ever do reach the destination, would require a lot from both parties in order to rectify. Once you or the cheater come clean, there needs to be a plan put in place. It takes energy from both sides to rebuild the trust and intimacy in the relationship.

And this process can come with new parameters being enforced — ones that may be hard for both sides to acclimate to. There is no list of must-haves on the healing-from-cheating plan. Know that the healing process takes time. It is up to you and your partner to determine how long you need to heal and when trust is reestablished. This isn't a two-week fix.

Tessina agrees, and says that if both parties are willing and focused on mending the relationship after one person cheated, it can be done. If there is a sincere change in behavior, and if the problems that led to the infidelity are addressed and corrected, and both parties approach the problem with a sincere wish to discover what went wrong and fix it, then forgiveness is an important part of the healing process, whether the couple stay married or not.

But sex educator and columnist Gigi Engle advises to approach the optimism of being able to continue a relationship after cheating with caution. I truly think that if you cheat on someone, the relationship is over. You're essentially ending it by betraying your partner. Some people can forgive their cheating partner and try to move on, but how can you really let that go? It will always be something that is between you. If you are in a relationship that you really want to save, you won't do something that is disrespectful like this. Cheating is not something you just accidentally do.

You have to kiss someone, go somewhere private with them, take all their clothes off, and then physically have sex with them. The factors to consider here are why you [or your partner] did this. At the heart of that question nearly every time is a lack of respect for your partner, your relationship, and yourself. People cheat because they want their relationship to end, but don't know how to or don't have the nerve to break up with their partner.

Once I was in college and in a long-term relationship, it was because there were things I wasn't getting from the relationship, but I had no idea how to communicate that to my partner. So I just cheated. Sometimes with different people for different things I needed. It was also fun. Yep, I said it.


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I also didn't believe I would find the right guy, anyway. This was back in the '90s when us ladies were way less woke on our self-worth and ability to tell a guy to take a hike. This lasted into my first marriage, who I cheated on as well because he was abusive and neglectful. Eventually I moved out and initiated a divorce , and got lots of therapy to figure out where this behavior was coming from.

Now I'm remarried and have been happy for 10 years. First things first, after you've committed the crime, you need to take a hard look at whether or not you want the relationship to continue. Was the motivation behind your actions due to the fact that you want out of your current romantic situation? Or was it truly a one time mistake that you wish you could take back if you could? If it's the latter, Dr.

Stubbs says step one is to tell your partner — no matter how unpleasant it may be to do.

Texas Tech Today

Communication with your partner is key. Ask yourself why you did what you did and then see if you can tease out an underlying reason of why. The popular dating app Tinder is all about helping people form new relationships. But for many college-aged people, it's also helping those in relationships cheat on their romantic partners.


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  4. A study of college students shows technology also increases the risk of getting caught..

The study, which involved additional collaborators, was published in Personality and Individual Differences. Among the undergraduate students who participated in the study, Ironically, although the numbers show college students are using Tinder to find partners outside their relationships, many of these same participants said they weren't sure Tinder was a good way to do so. In their study, Weiser and Niehuis, an associate professor, found two personality traits they said could predict a person's likelihood to cheat on a partner: Basically, men and women looked very similar when we accounted for personality.

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Weiser and Niehuis emphasized that it's unclear if Tinder is actually increasing rates of infidelity or simply giving people a different way to meet extradyadic partners. One disadvantage may be how this technology can also help facilitate infidelity. The College of Human Sciences at Texas Tech University provides multidisciplinary education, research and service focused on individuals, families and their environments for the purpose of improving and enhancing the human condition.

The college also offers graduate programs leading to the Master of Science and Doctor of Philosophy degrees.