Worst online dating profile

If you want to find love online, kudos. You probably will. It's a very popular way to get a date – just learn from these 15 worst dating profiles so.
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Honesty may be the best policy, but so is leaving a little to the imagination, and a lot to be learned by actually meeting in person. A dating profile is supposed to be a hint and preview, not a memoir and a platform for ranting. For every nice, clean photo and short and sweet write-up on a dating site, there are at least three that have potential suitors taking a vow of chastity and heading for hills.

Pretty Woman With 'Worst Online Dating Profile Ever' Still Got Dates - ABC News

If you want to find love online, kudos. Chuck is a sweet guy. He obviously takes care of himself. Look at that trim body and clean-shaven face.

Expensive clothes and a modern haircut round out his handsome looks. For all his suaveness, Chuck is forgetful. Girls get a bad rap sometimes. At least she is honest! We get that not everyone likes the delicate flavor of tea, and perhaps even the distaste of sunshine can be acceptable someone has to live in Alaska, after all but not liking cider? What kind of a woman are you! Oh right…the kind that could potentially stab her suitor in his sleep if he failed to respond to her text.

This guy wants to put you at ease so badly that he wastes no time in putting your greatest fear to rest.


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He is not going to murder you. No way, no how.

The Worst Online Dating Profile Ever Gets Huge Response

He is absolutely not going to bring a shovel — oh wait. He likes to dig. His world, as he describes it, is magical because of all the no murdering going on. This is a man that does not have murder on his mind. Feeling safer yet ladies? When we talk about not taking the mystery and intrigue out of a date, we usually think of ladies wearing too little or young guys that write their life stories and future dreams into their profile.

Make no mistake, those over a certain age can take the mystery right out at first blush too. Not everyone knows about the all caps rule, right? But everyone knows that religion and politics are sticky subjects to bring up before you even meet your date. Look, dude, we get it. Actually, this guy that looks like he could absolutely hold down an unwilling victim easily is doing us all a really big favor.

That shows poor impulse control. That is a warning. His attempt at humor points out that he hit his victims. The ball is in our court with this one, ladies. I suggest taking that ball and running for the nearest exit as fast as you can.

4 Things I Learned from the Worst Online Dating Profile Ever

Again, you have been warned! What more do we need to know, Apples? What more do we need to know? What are your hobbies? What is your career?

Dating Fails

Do you like long walks on the beach? The cute, freckled, girl-next-door look is ruined by two things. First, calling your parents names is a no-no. That screams of family issues and that can get your profile overlooked faster than promising to not murder your dates which you think would be a good thing or promising to save their souls see both examples above.

Putting an apple in your mouth is reminiscent of the succulent roasted pig appreciated at cookouts, and honey, you deserve so much more than that comparison. Clearly, you are cute and have a sense of humor, so show your true self. A couple of years ago, a story floated around the Internet about a woman that set up a profile just so she could eat at fancy restaurants and have her date pick up the tab. Stories also abound about men that date beautiful women, but turn out to be nothing but dine-and-dashers, leaving their date with nothing but disgust and a huge restaurant tab.

This singleton had very few requirements when it came to picking a date.

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Man of few words: This singleton didn't exaggerate his talents when it came to his profile. The views expressed in the contents above are those of our users and do not necessarily reflect the views of MailOnline. Thursday, Jan 17th 5-Day Forecast. Share or comment on this article: Are these the worst online dating profiles ever?

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