Dedicated to the exploration of human behavior, dating and mating, love and do you have questions but would rather not publish your personal story online?.
Table of contents
- Why You Shouldn't Accept Sofa Dates
- Dating Magic: Persuasion, Evoking Positive Feelings | The Mirror of Aphrodite
- A Support System
- Mirror of aphrodite dating a disappearing man
We argued on the porch when he said, "forget this come in This is when he changed and became rude and stated, " I was going to be a man about this but since you don't care it's over" I'm not sure if that was the case but he asked me to delete his number and not call him and that my behavior was almost scary and think he made a wrong decision to be with me. I really didn't care about what he was saying because the only thing I felt I did wrong was come to his house but I didn't lie to him, or stood him up, or played with his emotions so I felt like I should have been saying what he said to me.
However I did send him a text message that night apologizing for disrespecting his space and I told him I would have never did him like that. I havent heard back from him and I guess I want to know if he ever really cared for me? Or was this a game of cake and eat it too?
Why You Shouldn't Accept Sofa Dates
And do you think he will ever talk to me again or reach out to me? I'm not sure what I want and I know I deserve better but I also feel like he was good to me and maybe I ran him off Please help with your advice. Anonymous Dec 19, 4: I don't care if it's casual or not, this shit's clearly going to this man's head. That's downright ignorant and disrespectful. Seeing each other casually is one thing, but making the woman feel like shit about herself in the meantime is entirely different.
Me being me, my knee-jerk response to that would've been something along the lines of, "Oh yea, well that's interesting because I was just thinking the other day that I was going to demote you to my once a month fun time guy. It's actually troubling because it somewhat signals that this guy is, in a sense, capable of leading a double life.
If he's tired of apologizing. He pushes your buttons and then when you explode, he blames you. That's immaturity, arrogance, and lack of being accountable for his own actions, which are entirely creating the situation. STOP apologizing to this chooch. He's a dick, he's a player, he's an arrogant asshole and he's an immature man-boy.
This particular story got me worked up, I'm cursing here, LOL. This chump has absolutely nothing to offer you. DO NOT wish for that in your life dear. Have you read the comment you left about how he's treated you?
Dating Magic: Persuasion, Evoking Positive Feelings | The Mirror of Aphrodite
I don't care if he paid for dinners or bills, etc. After he did those things, he toyed with your emotions and always tried to cut you down to size. Who the hell needs that?
You can buy your own dinners dear and pay your own bills with a lot less hassle, ya' know? There was very little in your comment that signaled he treated you good and what little there was - was a complete washout with all the bad that followed.
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And you didn't run him off dear. He's manipulating you into thinking that's what happened here because he isn't mature or accountable for his own actions. He doesn't realize that he makes women feel like absolute shit about themselves and that, as a result of his own actions, HE is the one that's responsible for sending women into an emotional orbit of an outburst.
Honey, anyone treated like that would eventually explode, ya' know? Bottom line dear, you want to be around a man that brings out the BEST in you. You DON'T want to be around some lame chooch who makes you feel like shit about yourself and brings out the worst in you. And that's what this guy does, even though he doesn't realize it. He makes women feel like shit about themselves and then when they react to that, he calls them crazy. It's his own fault dear, he's just incredibly immature and unable to see it.
Any woman dating a man like this would eventually have an outburst over the treatment. I don't care if it's a casual dating situation or not, the huge amounts of disrespect being rubbed right in your face here. Two mature adults can have a casual relationship without treating or talking to each other like dirt.
A Support System
I saw the immaturity but allowed my infatuation to mask what I knew in my heart to be wrong. I felt he was trying to break me and my strength was always a problem for him and the reason why I felt I was having to "dumb it down" to coexist in his world. I saw the immaturity and would question him about his word choice and action and he would give me excuses to why he felt he was like that but would tell me you're so smart and give me good advice I need you in my life.
I just can't believe I fell for this shit because every time he did for me by paying a bill or paying for everything I had the money in my account or in my purse it wasn't about that I thought I was with a "stand up" guy but it didn't take long until I started to question myself and why I was settling for this verbal abuse. I would tell my other male friends and male family members about the dumb shit he would say or do and they ALL said to run and leave him alone he's no good.
However, I was being manipulated with confessions, and false tears, and gifts, and "I need you" responses. I knew that night when he played me and totally disrespected me that I had to get out of this crazy cycle but the kind of woman and person that I am I also felt that I needed to apologize for losing my cool not because I wanted him to think he was right and I was wrong but because I was disappointed in me for giving up my power and allowing this guy to dictate how I felt about myself. I can only be responsible for my actions and my apologies was for how I reacted to his bullshit.
When you know better you are supposed to do better. I let him get in my head and for that I am royally pissed lol. Anonymous Dec 19, There's nothing wrong with you, you just met a very selfish, very immature man is all. And all is not lost over this experience dear. Whether you realize it or not, this was a very valuable learning experience for you and it's pretty much a guarantee that after this, moving forward, you will NEVER let this happen to you again - and that is worth a million bucks - it's very valuable.
Don't sell yourself short just to have a man in your life. Being single is NOT the end of the world and, as a matter of fact, can be some of the most enjoyable times in your life. You've got freedom, independence, beauty inside and out, lots of good men still out there to choose from.
Mirror of aphrodite dating a disappearing man
Hi Mirror, I've been reading your site for about a year and posted before. I am so desperate this morning I don't know where to start. Posting here because I think this article might be most helpful for me at this time. My boyfriend has become detached from me. He is very close with a long time friends with benefits who is visiting this week. I have smothered him, shown great insecurity and nagged so much I have driven him away. Yet, the blame is not entirely with me. He now denies he loves me, he isn't nearly as interested in sex as he used to be though he still says I'm one of the best he's ever had.
He rarely gives compliments so I mention this even though I'd much rather be complimented for being a caring person with a good heart. His fwb is making this trip with the goal of splitting us up. I am tying to keep this brief so I won't go into all the details.
He will be spending time with her as they do go way back. He will not be spending time alone with her is what he stated to me. I don't have anything personally against her. I think we are just both in a messed up situation, she is in love with him as am I. I realize this is rambling. Reflects my very emotional state of mind.